So I totally biffed it on my walk to work today.
The sun was shining, birds were chirping, the traffic was rolling at a good clip, and the snow was melting. Which of course meant a watery puddle covering some ice, and my boot sole being drawn toward it with magnetic force. It was a complete and unadulterated wipe-out that saw my feet fly out from under me, leaving me on my ass with legs and arms up in the air. Turtle turtle.
As is usually the case when I make a complete fool myself, my first thought was “I wonder how many people just saw me do that”. But immediately after that came a recollection of how hilarious it is to see someone bite it on an icy day. Or to watch someone hurt themselves in any minor way, really. I wonder why I can’t control the muscles in my face when I watch a kid run his bike into the curb, or when a player takes a basketball to the face, or when someone slips down a few stairs and utters the inevitably hilarious sounds associated with a sudden loss in balance (my personal favourite? a friend in elementary school, slipping on ice and loudly saying “WHOOOOP!” as she crashed onto her back….. I don’t think she ever forgave me for laughing so hard). I generally even find joy in my own small pains and social humiliations: like at age 11, when I took off my pinching dress shoes at a funeral reception and slipped in my nylon-clad feet, dropping my plate of cantaloupe and causing a loud boom that the other guests assumed was a great-grandmother collapsing in cardiac arrest. It became extremely funny, once I was out of the reproachful, dirty looks from all the blue-hairs in attendance.
For this extremely selfish reason, I hope the warm, melt-y weather continues (and that my jeans start drying out…).
The molecules slide
Rubber on water on ice
Overturned coffee

February 21, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Ok. I clicked the link. Funny shit.
February 21, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Also: that turtle pic cracks me up.
February 24, 2008 at 5:16 pm
This post justifies my love for America’s Funniest Videos…with Tom Bergeron, not Saget.